Ok, it's noon. I just woke up and ate breakfast. Read a bit in The Psychoanalyst and the Artist. Interesting thoughts. Maybe I'm an artist. I suppose so. Stupid words.
Well, it's a business day, so I can call that company I may work for. Also get my application in for that other business, though I don't have too much hope on that one. Argh. When will this be over? We'll work on it.
I don't feel like I have much to discuss. Not much happened during my sleep. Not that I remember, anyway. And my mind is tired right now. I'm too sick of life in general to really do much. It's days like this I think I'd just rather go flying somewhere, and see someone. Like my close friend; I wonder how he's doing. Or her. Why's she so stuck on my mind lately? Urgh. Maybe this is what is commonly referred to as "heavy on my heart". Well, then. God, help her. I can't, really, from here.
That was interesting. Don't think I've ever prayed in this thing before. Well, now I have. There's another interesting thing. How in the world can people pray for hours at a time? You say what you need to say, and you're done. God is infinite; he doesn't even really need you to say it. And there's the whole Biblical issue of not praying long-winded prayers for show alone. Yet Jesus prayed for very long periods of time. I suppose my concept of prayer will have to be expanded beyond the normal definition. That's fine; it is already. But I guess I can think differently now.
Then there's the issue of corporate prayer. That stuff's really more for the benefit of the people participating than anything else; I remember the time I prayed for those friends of mine in an e-mail. I observed that that sort of prayer was really intended more for the prayed-for party's comfort than anything else. The knowledge that someone cares for them, a good audio anchor on what God can do for them, that sort of thing. I understand that. But it makes me feel less and less like praying aloud with people. Because, often, the situation is one where I really want to be praying, and when that happens people are a hindrance. If I did my usual succinct entreaty, people would look down on me because I wasn't "spiritual" enough. And if I spoke long to make the people happy (and/or impressed), I wouldn't be praying. Harumph. People. Can't live with 'em, cant live without 'em… Don't think I've ever really used that expression before. Well, it fits now.
What else can I do? I should work on Multitude today. Okay, actually I should work on my job hunt today. But Multitude should get some time. After all, if I want to be an author, I need to have written something. Well.
Running out of things to say. Short paragraphs are appearing all over the place. Well, it'll help me get to the bottom of this page, I suppose.
My brother is down here cleaning the basement. Or, at least, that's what he's supposed to be doing. It's the usual drill my siblings go through when they're supposed to be cleaning up. Mostly he's sitting there, and occasionally throws something somewhere in a box. There. I told him to start working, so that he could go outside. He sped up a little. I do that, too; delay on something I don't want to do. That's really stupid behavior, because more time is spent on the thing disliked. I wonder why we do that. Maybe something about our parents. Maybe something genetic (which, I suppose, would be something about Mom). Not that I want to criticize my parents; they did a good job, I think. Heck, it could be that I'm the one who started it, and taught my siblings that "technique". I hope not.
Well, the wide world of business awaits me. I should get to those want ads and start cracking. Though I wish I didn't have to. Hm. Society.
I'm definitely on a mood downswing right now.